Life is long enough.

Sadness is a friend that has come knocking at your door far too often. You cannot help but answer – you, who wears tear-stained cheeks and bloodshot eyes. Rain pounds on your windows like it is trying to find you. Darkness follows you about like a storm cloud you just cannot seem to shake. The once-smiling planes of your face contort into this mask of despair. This shadowy world  has become all you know.

Your fragile heart is breaking. The ship has sailed in this hurricane for far too long; you are sinking, and you have forgotten how to swim. Drowning, drowning – tomorrow seems to be an impossible dream. Sleep, eternal sleep seems to dance, tempting in its soothing song of escape. This world is already over. You are ready to let go.

No.

Don’t you know this world is beautiful? Don’t you know you are loved? Don’t you know that happiness could lie ahead? The battle will be hard – you will have to fight, fight with every ounce of your being. There will be days of sorrow, of monsters come to prowl, but you will survive because you must.

Every step will be a miracle, every word a prayer, every breath an hallelujah to the universe watching over you.

Choose love, choose life. Choose summer days and the sandcastles you will build. Choose the quiet mornings when the world is still sleeping. Choose dancing in the rain, a warm cup of coffee. Choose old books and freshly cut grass. Choose sunshine and rain and singing along to the radio at the top of your lungs. Choose falling leaves and the smell of trees.

Choose dancing in the midst of a crowded ballroom, his hands warm against yours. Choose sighing and laughing and rolling your eyes. Choose skydiving and bungee jumping. Choose unhealthy food and mountain climbing. Choose music. Choose all the books you have yet to read, all the people you have yet to meet, all the songs you have yet to hear, all the places you have yet to see. Choose hope and courage and wonder and adventure and everything in between.

Choose everything you were too afraid to let yourself love.

Choose tomorrow, because the world is so much brighter than it seems.

There will be better days.

Forgotten Places.

there is a silence here

seeping into the cracks

distant echoes of times

of loneliness

 

memories muffled

by the treads

of booted feet and

the crumble of debris

 

the pervasive silence

growing deep and thick

as though a blanket of snow

has settled over this town

 

my thoughts have grown

to be shrouded

in this quiet

uncertainty

 

but even the quiet

cannot shield

the sounds

of a heart broken

Letters I Would Never Send

To the boy who thought 

He was my knight in shining armor, 

Don’t try to fix me

What – do you think I’m broken?

I’m doing just fine.

To the ones who thought 

They could bring me down,

Your words are so sharp,

Piercing like knives and gunshots.

But I am stronger.

 

To the ones who left

As soon as they saw the chance,

You lost your one chance.

You will regret this one day.

You would have been proud.

To my demons, who hurt 

Worse than anything else,

You have always hurt,

Made me scared of my own mind.

But now you are gone.

 

To myself in every single

Moment of darkness,

Night comes, bringing tears.

You are your own worst nightmare.

The sun is rising.

The Ramblings of a Maddened Soul

This night feels like a void I could never hope to fill. Alone, I never can hope to fill the silence echoing though this darkness.

 

Shattered glass glistens with a delicate beauty. Each flash of light passing so quickly; I begin to doubt if they happened at all in their evanescence. I reach out to touch, hands moving through the air like a knife through flesh and bone. As the edges start to touch my skin – still warm with my flowing blood – they threaten to rip my soul apart. Stop!

 

Be still, be silent.

 

This night is too silent to breathe.

 

I cannot breathe. My heart pounds against my chest. Lungs expand and contract – all they were ever meant to do. With each passing breath, I feel less and less alive. I am fine. Yet on this night, I feel anything and everything but.

 

I am so alone in my gentle suffering.

 

Do not leave me in this silence, this empty longing. Do not leave me.

 

Tonight, I am haunted by the ghosts of my own creation, these memories I have made for my own downfall. They come at the darkest times, bringing doubt and pain and sorrow I thought I had already forgotten.

 

The monsters do not hide in the closet. Tonight, they live in my mind.

Poetry (in six word stories)

The stars, too, now have disappeared

These skies cry tears of lamentation

Each day does pass so fleetingly

Sleep calls me this absent lover

 

Love knocks, and no one answers

Expectations only ever end in regret

Hope only brings oceans of tears

Hearts shrouded in mystery, love lost

 

Houses of secrets keep only lies

Truth has been an unwilling friend

This world turns darker than ever

Endless nights, and nevermore the dawn

Wanderlust, Wonder Lost (A Pantoum)

A/N: I am terribly sorry for that pretty long hiatus. Thank you to everyone who waited that long to hear little old me posting again.

I have forgotten how it feels to walk the footsteps of wonder

And perhaps I have become naught but lifeless flesh and bone

To this universe I had once filled with light and color

But now all yesterdays have decayed with the setting sun

 

I have become naught but lifeless flesh and bone

Always waiting for the breath of air my lungs can no longer recall

All the yesterdays decaying with the setting sun

And empty words of tomorrow forgotten on the wind

 

I wait for the breath of air my lungs can no longer recall

As my heart ceases to pump the blood through my veins

Empty words of tomorrow are forgotten on the wind

But still my lifeless body does nothing but this cursed wait

 

This night seems endless, such contrast to my priceless dawn

This universe – I had once filled it with light and color

Now I am mere mortal, every thought heavy in my soul

I have forgotten how it feels to walk the footsteps of wonder