This night feels like a void I could never hope to fill. Alone, I never can hope to fill the silence echoing though this darkness.
Shattered glass glistens with a delicate beauty. Each flash of light passing so quickly; I begin to doubt if they happened at all in their evanescence. I reach out to touch, hands moving through the air like a knife through flesh and bone. As the edges start to touch my skin – still warm with my flowing blood – they threaten to rip my soul apart. Stop!
Be still, be silent.
This night is too silent to breathe.
I cannot breathe. My heart pounds against my chest. Lungs expand and contract – all they were ever meant to do. With each passing breath, I feel less and less alive. I am fine. Yet on this night, I feel anything and everything but.
I am so alone in my gentle suffering.
Do not leave me in this silence, this empty longing. Do not leave me.
Tonight, I am haunted by the ghosts of my own creation, these memories I have made for my own downfall. They come at the darkest times, bringing doubt and pain and sorrow I thought I had already forgotten.
The monsters do not hide in the closet. Tonight, they live in my mind.